“First night of vacation and we go to pull out the sofa bed for the kids, hear a loud crunching sound… Son’s iPhone fell between the cushions and got caught in hinges of bed frame…”

Well, there goes my good mood.

“Just moved into town and made gift baskets for all of our new neighbors!….One of them threw it back onto our lawn and called the cops on us for trespassing.”

“Ordered size 8 men’s shoes and got this.”

“My apartment received a shockwave from a missile that hit my neighborhood.”

“When you realize it’s been a little too quiet in the office lately.”

“My master key ring broke.”

“Bought a brand new extension cord this morning to improve my home landscaping game. It did not last ten minutes in my hands.”

“My girlfriend found a slug in her salad after she ate the whole thing.”

“I forgot that i don’t have an ounce of melanin in my skin and i fell asleep on the beach for 4 hours.”

“Forgot my cookies :(“

“My Humpty Dumpty bath bomb arrived shattered.”

“My dog broke my blinds just so she can do this…”

“My front yard 12 hours ago.”

“Is it funnier knowing that these are antidepressants?”

“My younger siblings destroyed my final from high school fine arts class.”

“15 minutes after heading to bed someone destroyed my home and business and took my cat.”

“Person fined for speeding while their car was being towed.”

“I wanna know who at Amazon said, ‘Let’s pack this body wash in a regular envelope and hope for the best!'”

“Just getting into my car after grocery shopping when this happened shutting the door.”

“What happens when a graphic designer hates his client ?”

“Mold killer in my bathroom is itself moldy… I hate this flat so much…”

“Wondering which neighbor lost house keys.”

“Next Door Neighbors Painted Their House Yellow.”

“I ordered gummy vitamins on Amazon and live in Arizona.”